Bachelor Recap, Episode 7: Sporty Ben

Ben plays basketball, visits Wrigley field, and sacrifices a virgin.

This week in Bachelor-land, it’s all about…Indiana. That’s right. Ben takes the ladies to where it all began, the tiny close-knit, definitely-better-on-TV-than-in-real-life, town of Warsaw.

The episode begins with Ben showing us his home in a red pickup truck and yelling out the window to possibly invisible adoring townsfolk. In case you missed the hint: Ben is adored here!

He pulls up to an old-timey looking diner filled with people who are most likely extras hired by ABC, and sits down with his parents to discuss his journey so far. They both look generally displeased during the entire conversation, as they ask themselves what terrible parenting decisions led them to this place.

Ben bids his parents adieu and goes off to meet the ladies, who we see throwing leaves on each other as they walk to the giant motorboat Ben pulls up in. Overcompensating, much? Ben asks Lauren B. on a date in front of all the other girls, and whisks her away to all his favorite childhood spots.

Ben takes her to a youth club where he used to mentor children. All the kids greet Ben with open arms and instantly love Lauren (who can blame them? She looks like a real life princess). They play basketball with local kids and Ben gives us all the feels when he holds a baby.

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Lauren and Ben look happily in love, and that’s basically it. Boooring.

Next, we find out Jojo gets the next date much to the dismay of the other ladies. Ben takes her to Wrigley field, the home of his favorite baseball team. They awkwardly put on matching “Mr. and Mrs. Higgins” uniforms, which kind of makes us uncomfortable given the fact that Ben is currently dating five other women. They run around playing baseball and looking hot for a while, and then they have dinner and the conversation gets serious.

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Ben asks her whether or not she really has feelings for him and she reassures him that she does despite her insecurities from past relationships. They kiss it out and all is good in paradise. Another snooze-fest, tbh.

On the group date, Ben, Caila, Amanda, and Becca fly kites to pass the horribly awkward time before he has to choose only one of them to spend the evening with. He ends up giving it to Amanda, and the rest of the girls, especially Becca who decides to totally lose it this week, freak out. Little does Becca know that she shouldn’t be even a tiny bit upset because Ben ends up taking Amanda to McDonalds. That’s right folks, you read that right. ABC forgoes their massive budget that can make even Indiana seem exciting and have Ben and Amanda go work the drive-through line! Yippee!

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They then go to an amusement park where Ben proceeds to scream like an infant on every ride they go on. He looked ridiculous—you’re lucky you have that face, bud. Ben lets Amanda know how excited he is to meet her children, and she swoons in her Spongebob voice. All is well here too.

Now, the good stuff. The final one on one date goes to none other than our favorite unemployed twin, Haley. No, wait, Emily. Eh, who cares really? He takes her on a boat and Emily lets us all know that she doesn’t know what a swan is. Emily, what?? Ben then takes her to meet his parents…yeah…disaster waiting to happen. Along with a variety of other things, she claims that Indiana is “so different” from Vegas because there are ducks in Indiana, and that her life-long dream is to be an NFL cheerleader. This literally makes Ben’s mom cry in horror, and, to nobody’s surprise, Ben sends her packing. Thing 1 and Thing 2 are officially gone. We’re all sad about it and you can be too.

At the final rose ceremony, Ben blindsides Becca (despite her straight up asking him not to), leaving us left with the final four we predicted last week.

Now things will really start to heat up… Stay tuned!